


The Care of Your Cabbage by Atsuko Kagari

by Wileycap



Category: Little Witch Academia
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-03
Updated: 2020-01-03
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:26:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22092532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wileycap/pseuds/Wileycap
Summary: After the Noir Missile Crisis, both life and school continue. A class assignment – requiring every Luna Nova student to submit one new piece of knowledge, no matter what it is, to a new magical archive – leads to embarrassment for Akko, as she is, for once, ahead on her schoolwork. Just that she didn't mean to submit it. And it isn't really schoolwork.Naturally (and mortifyingly for Akko), Diana is very curious to find out what exactly Akko could have submitted.
Relationships: Diana Cavendish & Atsuko "Akko" Kagari, Diana Cavendish/Atsuko "Akko" Kagari
Comments: 54
Kudos: 509





	The Care of Your Cabbage by Atsuko Kagari

**Author's Note:**

> This is a fairly light fic, meant to be fluffy and cute. It’s also my first foray into fic in well over ten years, so all feedback is appreciated!

# The Care of Your Cabbage by Atsuko Kagari

A cough.

Professor Finnelan didn’t really need to cough to get the attention of the class. Even Amanda, as notoriously rebellious as she was, knew better than to disrupt any lecture given by the Professor, as her strictness was legendary. Still, every time she stepped in front of the class, she would stand still and clear her throat.

No, she didn’t need the attention of the class. She needed the attention of the Akko, who – having been doodling something in a notebook while trying to cast some sort of spell on a potted plant - heard the Professor, and promptly dropped notebooks and the potted plant (which promptly broke, spreading soil all over the floor) in an effort to clear her desk and locate the correct book for whatever lesson they were having.

Finnelan turned her eyes towards the ceiling.

There was no book. There was no lesson. This was simply an assembly to close out the day, and Kagari should have _known_ that. She’d hoped that stopping the Noir Missile and restoring the flow of magic throughout the world would’ve meant that Kagari would start being a better student. And, if she was being entirely fair, Kagari _had_ started being a better student – her grades were up, at least, though that development could just as easily be attributed to her ever-closening friendship with one Diana Cavendish. The very same Diana Cavendish who had just turned around to see what the commotion behind her was, and instead of admonishing Kagari – as she surely would’ve done only a scant few months ago – Finnelan could have sworn that the blonde witch simply sighed and waved her wand to repair the broken pot and clear the floor of soil. Kagari, in response, gave an embarrassed grin.

“Are we, perhaps, ready to begin?” Finnelan fixed both Cavendish and Kagari with a glare. A habit that she had, no doubt brought on by years and years of experience in teaching, was that whenever she glared at a misbehaving student, Anne Finnelan liked to imagine a deathly ray coming out of her eyes and literally melting away whoever dared to disturb her class. (As far as violent fantasies towards student were concerned, in teaching circles this was considered to be quite mild.) Usually, it was extremely effective. In this case, the ray slid right off Cavendish’s impassive visage and was then entirely deflected by the happy grin and thumbs up that Kagari gave her.

Grudgingly, Finnelan decided to let it go, and began speaking.

“As you all know, or should know” – another glare at Kagari, again ineffective – “headmistress Holbrooke has decided to create a new magical archive, to serve as a backup for all of our current tomes and scrolls. The new archive’s mission is to bring our… outdated… way of recording information up to a more _modern_ standard.”

The word _modern_ , coming out of her mouth, sounded uncannily like a curse word. Everyone knew of her dislike of all things modern, especially so-called “modern magic.”

“In order to test the archive, we must feed it information and see that it does not make a mess of things before we feed it all of our most precious tomes and scrolls. Now, the new archive will work like so: beside me” – she gestured to the small metal basket at her side, which looked suspiciously like a trash can – “is the receptable. Your assignment for the weekend is simple: write some information and your name on a piece of paper and drop it into the receptable. For the assignment, each piece of information must be distinct, that is, no two pieces of information may be the same, so you may look up whatever other students have submitted through a terminal that has been installed in the North Tower. The minimum length is one page. The Headmistress and Professor du Nord encourage you to be creative and to have… fun.”

She disliked both creativity and fun, as well.

“Any student who has already completed the assignment is exempt. That means Cavendish and Kagari. You are dismissed.”

With that, Finnelan turned on her heels, and briskly walked out of the room, seemingly eager to leave behind the offending trash can – that is, receptable.

* * *

As the door closed behind her, the class erupted into numerous discussions. Beside Akko, Lotte Jansson, the orange-haired Finnish witch, was amazed.

“I can’t believe you actually completed an assignment ahead of time!” she exclaimed. “Especially one we didn’t even know about…”

On the other side of Akko, her friend, the potions master Sucy Manbavaran was more chagrined than happy.

“Could have told us, too. Then we wouldn’t have to do it now.” she drawled. “What did you even submit, dum-dum?”

In front of Akko, Diana turned around. She had heard of the assignment from Professor Pisces, when she had been helping the aquatic professor organize her notes (hard to do with no arms) and had simply submitted one of her less than stellar treatises on the effects of the lunar cycle on faeries – she, like Professor Finnelan, wasn’t very trusting towards modern magic, and had chosen something she could live with losing.

“Akko must have heard of it from Professor du Nord”, she spoke, her voice clear. “But I am curious. What did you submit, Akko?”

In Akko’s seat, Akko was turning redder by the moment. Her eyes were darting between the receptable and the expectant faces of Lotte, Sucy and Diana. When she finally spoke, her voice was very, very small.

“I thought it was a trash can.”

* * *

“Okay, so…”

They were gathered outside the dining hall. After they had left the classroom to go to dinner, Akko had been acting strange, and it clearly had something to do with her mystery submission. Lotte had given up trying to pressure Akko fairly quickly, and Sucy was simply indifferent, but Diana was burning with curiosity – and so, after Akko had suddenly announced that she wouldn’t be joining them for dinner but would instead be “doing something else”, Diana had cornered her outside the dining hall and demanded the truth, with Lotte and Sucy spectating. Hannah and Barbara, who had been quietly trailing Diana, simply exchanged a meaningful look and went ahead.

“Well, I wrote something… um, very embarrassing, and then I went to throw it in the trash – and I was writing in the study room right beside the teacher’s lounge, by the way – so when I got out of there, there was a trash can right outside the teacher’s lounge, and I tossed it in there, and…” Akko fidgeted with her sleeve. “Anyways, now I have to get it back from there.”

“Yes, but what was it that you wrote?” Diana asked. Akko blushed. “Surely you can tell us!”

“No, I can’t! It’s… um, it’s personal!” Akko shook her head and avoided Diana’s eyes. Behind Diana, Sucy’s eyes lit up.

“Sure, you don’t have to tell us”, Sucy spoke just as Diana was about to argue. “But tell you what. Me and Lotte still have our assignments, so we’re pretty busy.”

Sucy paused, moving her finger to her chin, as if thinking. Lotte looked at her friend, clearly suspicious, but said nothing. Sucy spoke up again.

“Hey, Diana?” Without waiting for an answer, she continued. “Your assignment is done, right? So you can help the dum-dum get her _personal_ piece of writing out of the magic thing?”

“Yes, obv-“

“No-“

Diana and Akko had spoken at the same time. Diana looked at the brunette incredulously. Akko flushed an even deeper shade of red. _Why would she refuse help?_

Beside her, Sucy was now grinning openly. Lotte’s lips were pursed – it looked as if she both desperately wanted and didn’t want to intervene. “No, Akko? Why ever would you refuse Diana Cavendish, sorceress extraordinaire? If you want to get it out of the archive, she’s your best bet.”

Akko was about to have a conniption. “I- that- Diana- Diana is really busy, I – she doesn’t have to- _you_ don’t have to, Diana, just, dinner in peace and – um – “

“I assure you, Akko, it is no trouble. I have nothing better to do except to help a friend.” _And find out what you so desperately want to hide._ The last part went unsaid. Diana peered at the shorter witch, who was clearly uncomfortable, with a mixture of curiosity and a little pang of guilt for making Akko so obviously uncomfortable.

Sucy’s grin widened still. “It’s decided. C’mon, Lotte.”

Without another word, she dragged Lotte – who cast Akko a sympathetic look as she was being pulled away – with her to the dining hall, leaving Akko alone with Diana. Akko was looking everywhere except Diana; whose curiosity was now a burning need to know. What could be so embarrassing for the eternally happy-go-lucky witch?

“So… shall we go?”

Akko nodded weakly.

* * *

They walked in complete silence. It was unprecedented. Diana had spent enough time with Akko to know that silence was decidedly uncharacteristic for the brunette. She recalled that Akko had once gotten from homicide detectives to the Queen of England between them lining up for dinner in the dining hall and getting to the table with their dinner.

It was one of the things she most liked about Akko, if she was entirely honest.

They came out to the gardens on their way to the North Tower. The plants bloomed all around them, in an eternal state of magical spring. Diana was suddenly reminded of something.

“So… what was with the potted plant?”

“Huh?”

“In the classroom, you had a potted plant with you. I was wondering why.”

“Oh, shoot! I almost forgot!” Akko perked up, and promptly stopped to rummage around in her bag. After a brief search, she procured the potted plant – _her books must be covered in soil_ , Diana thought – and bent down to set it on the ground. “Luminara Lapiare!”

The plant’s leaves glowed softly for a moment. Akko then reached into her bag again and pulled out the notebook she had been doodling in – true enough, it had little black flecks of soil all over it – and ripped out a page. It had a drawing of a birthday cake and the words “HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERNIE” written on it. She propped the makeshift card to rest against the stem of the plant and lifted the pot to set it down at the root of a large oak. Having completed her task, she straightened up and wiped her hands on her skirt, before turning to find Diana looking at her, completely puzzled.

“It’s for Ernie – the garden goblin. We got to know each other at the strike! He likes to snack on the leaves, so I thought it’d make a good birthday gift.” Akko explained, matter-of-factly.

Diana was… lost.

“So kind…” she started, trailing off. She cleared her throat and continued. “… of you. To do so.”

“Aww, thanks.” Akko flashed a grin at her.

“May I ask – why the bioluminescence spell?”

“The glow?”

“Yes.”

“He says the glow makes the leaves taste better.”

“Ah.”

* * *

The rest of their walk to the North Tower was filled with Akko listing off the birthdays (and preferred gifts) of various fae she was friends with. As they neared the North Tower, Akko’s former awkwardness began to return. Seeing her friend’s discomfort, Diana was very close to simply calling the entire thing off, and letting Akko go inside on her own – but Diana’s curiosity was simply too strong, and so they pressed on.

The terminal was on the second floor of the North Tower. The two witches stopped in front of it. It resembled an info terminal at a shopping mall, being essentially a large screen on a stand. Akko hemmed, and reached out to gingerly touch the inactive screen.

It promptly came to life, glowing with two boxes, one reading “SEARCH WORK” and the other reading “SEARCH AUTHOR” visible on the screen. Akko stared. And did nothing.

“Well? Go on and search, then we will figure out how to delete it.” Diana instructed.

“Can you… turn around?” Akko asked.

Diana raised an eyebrow. “No.”

Hanging her head in defeat, Akko tapped the SEARCH AUTHOR-button with her finger, figuring it would be less embarrassing. To her confusion, no keyboard appeared – merely a speaker icon.

“I believe it wants you to speak your query.” Diana said. The terminal searched I BELIEVE and brought up “I Believe Mushrooms Are As Intelligent As (Some) People (This Means You Akko)” by Sucy Manbavaran, submitted three minutes ago. Diana’s lips quirked. “Hm. Seems like they haven’t yet fully distinguished between searching for works and searching for authors.”

Akko frowned and clicked the back arrow. Tapping SEARCH AUTHOR once more, she proceeded to almost whisper “Kagari Atsuko” at the device. Diana gave a little shiver – in regular speech, Akko would often pronounce her name with a distinctly English accent, but whenever she said it in a formal context, she would pronounce it in her natural accent. Diana found that and the whispered tone to be…

Her train of thought was derailed as Akko let out a little “eep.” On the screen, the words “The Care of Your Cabbage by Atsuko Kagari” were displayed. Diana’s eyes widened. What-? _Why would a simple horticultural essay be so embarrassing?_

“Del- _mmph!_ “ Akko began, but couldn’t get any further, as Diana had decided to resort to drastic measures, and clapped her hand over the shorter witch’s mouth. Akko proceeded to try and reach for the back arrow with her hand, so Diana looped her other arm over Akko’s ribcage, trapping her arms in place and bringing her into a sort of an embrace.

Diana was too busy to care, however. She had to know! Trying to hold the struggling witch in place, she yelped out “Read!”

The machine began reading, in a voice that highly resembled Professor du Nord’s voice.

_The Care of Your Cabbage by Atsuko Kagari._

_Hello. My name is Akko, and I am writing this list to show you how to properly care for your cabbage._

  1. _Your cabbage is sensitive_



_This is the most important one! Your cabbage might look like it doesn’t care about what people think or say, but that’s not true. It’s been through a lot of stuff already. It’s sensitive! Other people don’t realise it, but she is. Things people say get to her. Remember it and try to give her a break from all of it!”_

Diana hadn’t known cabbages to be particularly sensitive. If anything, they seemed to be quite indifferent. She also wasn’t sure why the cabbage was being referred to as both it and her.

  1. _Your cabbage is both sweet and sour_



_Don’t get offended if your cabbage is a little sour sometimes! She might tell you that you’re just being lazy when you complain about the boring homework. She makes up for it by doing all these little things, like correcting your magical history homework when she thinks you aren’t looking!! So don’t sweat the small stuff!_

Cabbage behaviour wasn’t something Diana was well-versed in, but she hadn’t heard of a cabbage – or any vegetable – that could function as a studying aid.

  1. _Your cabbage has super nice eyes_



_Try not to get lost in them. Like especially when she’s tutoring you._

Was some part of a cabbage known as the eye?

  1. _Don’t touch the hair_



_She doesn’t like that, even if you just want to figure out if those green things are actually hair or leaves or magic or something. So don’t._

Leaves. There was something that actually had something to do with cabbages! There was a nagging voice in the back of Diana’s head…

  1. _Your cabbage likes hugs but acts like she doesn’t_



_Give her a squeeze! She’ll be like Akko no don’t and sometimes she gets a little red but that’s just because she doesn’t get enough hugs. Give her more!!_

So Akko had a tendency to hug vegetables, as well? Somehow, the thought was endearing, and Diana found her arms tightening around the brunette in a way that had nothing to do with keeping her restrained.

  1. _Your cabbage needs reassurance_



_This is kind of the same as 1! But still important. Your cabbage still gets insecure about things, like the time she answered wrong at Lukic’s class and Amanda teased her about it. So say something like “it wasn’t even wrong, you just misheard the question” and she’ll perk right up!”_

Hang on. _Diana_ had answered wrong in Professor Lukic’s class.

  1. _Your cabbage might like you back_



_who am I kidding… she doesn’t… even if sometimes she’s looking at you too and, wouldn’t It be perfect? life it is interesting with her and she’s so smart, so beautiful, so… but she’s meant to be somewhere else. she’s not meant to be with some screwup who can’t even fly half the time. she’s meant to be in her fancy mansion dating some stupid aristocrat like Andrew (sorry Andrew) and… I’m just not that, you know?_

Wait!

  1. _Who am I kidding? Just throw this in the trash_



  1. _Diana I wish I had courage_



The screen shut down. In the black mirror, Diana could see herself – one of her greenish tresses had fallen over Akko’s head - holding Akko, who had squeezed her eyes shut and looked as if she wanted to melt away.

Akko opened her eyes. Startled, Diana let go, and took a step back, clearing her throat.

“Akko, I- ah.” Diana felt as red as Akko looked. “I- I am sorry, I shouldn’t have pried… That, ah, that wasn’t meant for me, clearly-“ _What do you mean, wasn’t meant for me?! Your name was on there! Say something, useless girl!_ Diana thought, trying to get her mouth to work. “I- well, this-“

She was interrupted.

“I’msorryIdidn’tmeantomakeyouuncomfortable”, sobbed Akko, with tears pooling around her eyes and her voice sounding absolutely mortified. Before Diana could say “excuse me”, Akko had already turned around and run away as fast as she could.

“Akko!” Diana shouted after her, but Akko wouldn’t stop. And Diana knew from experience that the shorter witch was much more athletic than her. And Diana had been tremendously boorish to force her to reveal… _that_ … in such a way, so she didn’t even have a right to stop her. Still, there had to be something she could do to make this right.

Diana groaned, and slammed her palms onto her forehead. _Idiot!_

* * *

It was the evening when she found Akko. Usually the exuberant witch seemed much larger than her stature, but right now, laying listlessly underneath the oak in the gardens, she looked downright tiny.

Diana felt a pang in her heart.

“Atsuko?” She called, unsure of why she was using her unshortened name.

Red eyes flashed briefly towards her, and then just as quickly towards the grass.

“Hello, Diana.” The tone was as lethargic as the rest of her appearance. Diana felt an uncomfortable weight in her chest.

“I… I wanted to say that I am terribly sorry about how I acted – I had no right to make you reveal that in such a fashion, and I merely wish to say that, that is, I… well, what you wrote, I…” Diana was stuttering again. She was furious at herself. _The one thing you absolutely need to say, and you’re mucking it up!_

But she still couldn’t get it out, no matter how she tried to bully her vocal chords into submission. There was a wall, blocking what she wanted to say. The wall was made of words – from her aunt, from various esteemed people that she had to be on good terms with, from herself – words like, “family”, “legacy”, “reputation”…

“It’s okay.” Again, Akko’s words were delivered without emotion. “I understand. You’re disgusted, and that’s fine. You won’t have to talk to me again. I’ll just… stay out of your way. I get it.”

Diana could only look.

“I just… if you could just… not tell anyone? Please?” The red eyes that locked onto her own had tears pooling in them, again. “I have lots of friends now and people like me, and this is an all-girls school, and I don’t want that… that reputation.”

Something snapped.

“Don’t you _dare_ say anything like that!” Diana’s tone surprised even herself. Akko flinched as if burned. Diana stared at her, wildly. “Don’t you –“

and just like that, the wall came crumbling down.

“There is nothing wrong with you! Just as there is nothing wrong with myself! And I certainly will not let you be a- a coward, now – when, just in your first month here, you weren’t afraid to strap yourself to a wild broom with- with a chain! You have the bravest heart I know of, and I will not let it fail now!”

Akko’s eyes were wide. Diana felt her cheeks begin to burn.

“I – I will admit that I am not very good at this. And I caused you much pain this afternoon, simply because of my idle curiosity. I apologize.” Diana rummaged around in her bag, pulling out a letter. “Here. I took what you wrote out of the archive and replaced it with one of my treatises on magical horticulture, but as it was meant for me, I am keeping it. In return, I shall give you this. I do not expect a… reaction now, I merely wish that you read it.”

Now her cheeks were truly red. Akko was still gaping at her in wonder, holding the letter.

“Well. Farewell.” Diana said, awkwardly turning around and beginning to walk.

She was wondering when Akko would respond – not that she would fault the other witch for hesitating. After all, she had been hurt. Her feelings might have… changed. Still, there was nothing to it. She had made her bed, and now she had to lie in it, no matter how it twisted her stomach and made her throat constrict.

Behind her, Akko opened the letter, and read the first line.

_Caring For Your Carrot – Diana Cavendish_

Diana received her answer some twenty seconds later, via an exhilarated Akko crashing into her back, wrapping her arms around Diana.

**Author's Note:**

> The Adventures of Carrot and Cabbage begin!
> 
> I'm not 100% happy with this fic (then again, nobody is ever truly happy with anything they create) but I think it's great to be getting back into writing fic and writing in general. I hope you like this, dear reader!


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